Well, in this blog entry I shall remmenis on my terrible habit of following through.. or lack there of.
Point number one: I said I would start posting more frequently... it hasn't happened.
When I was in middle school/freshman year of high school... I decided I was going to write a book. Much inspired I was by Brian Jaques (Rest his amazing soul) and Harry Potter (ehhh...) Narnia series (i even have rpc's of lions based of ol'assie) and...LOTR. (did you ever have any doubts?)
People who can't seem to grasp that short, hairy-footed creatures and all seeing eye balls and elves and everything else in those damned books are awesome, suck. End story.
And the Redwall series? Let me just say, THEY ARE NOT FURRIES. God, you guys. They are ANIMALS, not humanoid animals... its fantasy... not fetish. So stop hatin' on my authors.
So anyway, I decided to write a book. I was a pretty graphic little kid back then. Guts, crying, begging for mercy, torture, great bouts of depression.... Anything that COULD go wrong to my charactures, did. And I relished it.
My story, even had a moral. A happy ending. Suspense! Intrique.. and complete originality if I do say so myself. (Y'know, even though it was based off like a million other things) I in no way ripped off other peoples ideas.
It was a decent length too, 62 chaptures long. I hand wrote it ALL. it took months. MONTHS. It was amazing to see how my handwriting was in the beginning, and then 6 months later after all that writing how AMAZING it was! (and now its gone to shit again) hahaha.
I even wanted to have it published. I was so into it. I read the chaptures I wrote to my brothers and my cousins. I was, in my mind, the writing shit. I had it all, and so did my book.
That was until I forgot all about it and found the crinkled stack of papers years later.
Omg.... I sucked.
The concept was great. The ideas were fantastic... the action... well yeah. Like I said I had it all. But in the most horrendously writen, simple minded, crudely explained ways possible.
When you read a book, you have pictures painted in your mind. And forever one, even if they read the same thing, those pictures are different.
Reading my book would have probably made your imagination go blind.
Seriously. It was bad.
I vowed one day, to re-write it and not make it suck!... and here I am 22 years old and have NO idea what ever happened to my stone aged 62 long hand writen chapture book.
I remember most everything in it though. Hell, I was the one who wrote the piece of crap after all. And even though if anyone were to find it and read it now I would probably die of embarassment... I can't help but.... want to make it happen.
I never follow through. With anything. Even if you're paying me money, I'll get whatever I told you I was going to do, done. But I will do procrastinate up until literally the last minute.
But this time... I think this year my revolution is to Follow through. (shut up, I know it's March)
Seriously. Little by little I am going to revise this book. And who knows... maybe one day I really will be a published author. But here's the thing...
Accountability.
I'm going to try to finish one chapter a month. I probably will not be able to do it, but I will try. And when I finish a chapter (or in my most likely case, a decent chunk) I'll post it on here =D
I think it sounds like a fire proof plan.
In other news... I think I am going to be posting more.... sensible things on here. I'm going to keep my long, poorly thought out tangents and my strongly worded opinions, but I think I'm going to try to make my posts a little more relavent.... maybe then I can actually get some readers... HA.
Goodnight... o-o
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Excuse me sir, your religion is showing..
Well its been a few months now hasnt it!? In this entry, I refuse to use proper editing grammar OR/AND proper use of punctuation. Did you miss me?
Well from xmas to well...almost V day, (v day is also short for vagina day, because not only does everyone act like a total pussy about the "holiday" if they dont have a gf, but its not a "holiday" about couples. its about the vag. srsly you guys, you have a vagina (aka the gf) ((and no im not talking about jill)), and you are DEMANDED to make it the most magical day of their year...besides their birthday and your anniversary. and if you dont have a vagina, you're trying to score one. and if you are the owner of a vagina, you turn into mega bitch. if you dont have a penis on hand, you bitch about how its such a terrible "holiday" and you most likely end up drunk and gaining 3 1/2 lbs off of rose shaped candy you bought yourself at a pharmacy. if you do have a penis on hand, you must be proposed to and dinner must be at least over 100$. other wise its off with his head.) Ive been out and about doing my own thing.
Mostly that thing would be dealing with some way crazy shyt due to room mates. But you know what? as much as I would LOVE to give them the gratification of bitching about them so they could read this and show everyone and be like "See!? she's such a bitch!" I'm not going to give them any ammunition. 8D Even though that technically might be giving them something.. but they don't read this anyway! (i hope)
But due to that circumstance, I had no interwebs so to speak of, except the ol phone. and quite frankly we all remember the last time I tried typing a blog entry on my phone... *points below to the phale*
At any rate, I hope you all (being the what... 2 people that read this?) had pleasant holidays. Lordy knows I did. THE FOOD. GOOD GLOB.
but now im back in my own house and its so pretty. i redecorated and i actually dont hate being hear. here. uh... yeah. HERE. so now i can post moar. yehy!
I have some great videos to show you. Some of them...very close to my heart...... LOL lyk dis 1!
Thanks, JusReign. This video is awesome. Hahahaha.
I just watched the whole series of Soul Eater with my guuuuuy. (yea, dats rite. i gots a guy. my vag day is gonna fskeling pwn urs) and damn it was awesome. Some favourite quotes:
"Fool!"
"This top hat is lined with only the finest of English seaweed rolls!"
"eeeeexcalibuuuuuuuur. EEEEEEEEEXCALIBUUUUUUUUUR"
"I simply cannot abide hayseeds in the morning."
"MY SPECIAL MOVE.....COFFEE...TABLE....FLIP!" *flips the coffee table*
Grand grand... yes. I also got my first tattoo!! It was a very, very hard decision between this
or that stupid mustache in the inside of you finger. Obviously I choose this ^^^^ Autism Awareness :3 Inside of my arm, too. Cuz I'm a pussay. Hahaha
Lets see... what else to randomly mention? Oh yeah! My friend Goodless had a baby. She's grand. And mine is gonna be 7 months on the 13th! DAYUM. 7 months and I STILL look like I just had him! *squishes and smooshes floppy baby belly around* SUCKS.
Katsucon is coming up. Idk if I can make it this year. A little depressing.. but we're shit broke right now and all things considered it probably would be a very bad idea. What with kids and all.. just... no. No not at all no.
Ok... so I was thinking of this the other day... all about how it feels like Fall out side even though it's February and it's supposed to be snowy and springy.. and instead it's like 75 degrees in the afternoon and then like below 400 at night (its damn cold, son!) I miss Halloween. I love it so. Its one of my favourite holidays. But what am I going to be for Halloween this year? Same as I was last year. A dinosaur. But that got me to thinking about other types of costumes, and what my daughter was going to be. Last year she was a monkey. Cuz trust me... she's a monkey. But then that started getting me thinking about little girl costumes and how so many of them are f'd up. Srsly. The difference between the little girl costumes and the teen costumes are little girl costumes LOOK slutty, but are more cute. and teen girl costumes are slutty, but pretty. and then womens costumes are like "what? duck tape princess? yeah, i can work with that" idk. But so.... theres a genie costume.. for kids like 3 to 8. It's parachute pants, a halter top with glitter, and a scarf thing around your head. And I was sitting there thinking who the HELL would let their 3 year old walk out of the house IN OCTOBER wearing a freaking bikini (excludes beauty pagant moms. yall ladies are nutty in the head) Like.. come on. My mom was OBSEEEEEESSSSSED with modesty growing up. Have times really changed that much? On further investigation. I realized that it's not a real "two piece", there's actually a flesh coloured connecting band that goes over the kids stomach, to give the illusion that it's a 2 piece with out actually being a "two piece".
Ahem.........what?
It's innapropriate for little girls to run around in lingerie (sp?) showing all that skin! BUT if we cover the parts of their skin that would show, with see throughish cheap, skin coloured cloth, thats okay!
NO. It's not fucking ok!
Yall are dumbasses. It still LOOKS like your 3 year old is running around half nekkid trying to get some fat pedo guy from Ohio to pick her up in the back of a van.
SERIOUSLY. MAKE YOUR DAUGHTER WEAR SOME DAMN CLOTHES.
"This year for Halloween, we're gonna dress up like old people!" Yeah! You don't see any Ohians picking up old migits, do you? No. A curly mop wig, some big ol glasses and a mumu and your 3 year old not only has the most creative costume out there, but dress up your son like mr. magoo and enter them in a contest. i bet youd win. infact, tie your cat to a string and have her cart around Garfield as well. Live props coupled with novelty costume ideas give you a huge leading edge.
I literally can't think of anything else. Goodday.
Well from xmas to well...almost V day, (v day is also short for vagina day, because not only does everyone act like a total pussy about the "holiday" if they dont have a gf, but its not a "holiday" about couples. its about the vag. srsly you guys, you have a vagina (aka the gf) ((and no im not talking about jill)), and you are DEMANDED to make it the most magical day of their year...besides their birthday and your anniversary. and if you dont have a vagina, you're trying to score one. and if you are the owner of a vagina, you turn into mega bitch. if you dont have a penis on hand, you bitch about how its such a terrible "holiday" and you most likely end up drunk and gaining 3 1/2 lbs off of rose shaped candy you bought yourself at a pharmacy. if you do have a penis on hand, you must be proposed to and dinner must be at least over 100$. other wise its off with his head.) Ive been out and about doing my own thing.
Mostly that thing would be dealing with some way crazy shyt due to room mates. But you know what? as much as I would LOVE to give them the gratification of bitching about them so they could read this and show everyone and be like "See!? she's such a bitch!" I'm not going to give them any ammunition. 8D Even though that technically might be giving them something.. but they don't read this anyway! (i hope)
But due to that circumstance, I had no interwebs so to speak of, except the ol phone. and quite frankly we all remember the last time I tried typing a blog entry on my phone... *points below to the phale*
At any rate, I hope you all (being the what... 2 people that read this?) had pleasant holidays. Lordy knows I did. THE FOOD. GOOD GLOB.
but now im back in my own house and its so pretty. i redecorated and i actually dont hate being hear. here. uh... yeah. HERE. so now i can post moar. yehy!
I have some great videos to show you. Some of them...very close to my heart...... LOL lyk dis 1!
Thanks, JusReign. This video is awesome. Hahahaha.
I just watched the whole series of Soul Eater with my guuuuuy. (yea, dats rite. i gots a guy. my vag day is gonna fskeling pwn urs) and damn it was awesome. Some favourite quotes:
"Fool!"
"This top hat is lined with only the finest of English seaweed rolls!"
"eeeeexcalibuuuuuuuur. EEEEEEEEEXCALIBUUUUUUUUUR"
"I simply cannot abide hayseeds in the morning."
"MY SPECIAL MOVE.....COFFEE...TABLE....FLIP!" *flips the coffee table*
Grand grand... yes. I also got my first tattoo!! It was a very, very hard decision between this
Lets see... what else to randomly mention? Oh yeah! My friend Goodless had a baby. She's grand. And mine is gonna be 7 months on the 13th! DAYUM. 7 months and I STILL look like I just had him! *squishes and smooshes floppy baby belly around* SUCKS.
Katsucon is coming up. Idk if I can make it this year. A little depressing.. but we're shit broke right now and all things considered it probably would be a very bad idea. What with kids and all.. just... no. No not at all no.
Ok... so I was thinking of this the other day... all about how it feels like Fall out side even though it's February and it's supposed to be snowy and springy.. and instead it's like 75 degrees in the afternoon and then like below 400 at night (its damn cold, son!) I miss Halloween. I love it so. Its one of my favourite holidays. But what am I going to be for Halloween this year? Same as I was last year. A dinosaur. But that got me to thinking about other types of costumes, and what my daughter was going to be. Last year she was a monkey. Cuz trust me... she's a monkey. But then that started getting me thinking about little girl costumes and how so many of them are f'd up. Srsly. The difference between the little girl costumes and the teen costumes are little girl costumes LOOK slutty, but are more cute. and teen girl costumes are slutty, but pretty. and then womens costumes are like "what? duck tape princess? yeah, i can work with that" idk. But so.... theres a genie costume.. for kids like 3 to 8. It's parachute pants, a halter top with glitter, and a scarf thing around your head. And I was sitting there thinking who the HELL would let their 3 year old walk out of the house IN OCTOBER wearing a freaking bikini (excludes beauty pagant moms. yall ladies are nutty in the head) Like.. come on. My mom was OBSEEEEEESSSSSED with modesty growing up. Have times really changed that much? On further investigation. I realized that it's not a real "two piece", there's actually a flesh coloured connecting band that goes over the kids stomach, to give the illusion that it's a 2 piece with out actually being a "two piece".
Ahem.........what?
It's innapropriate for little girls to run around in lingerie (sp?) showing all that skin! BUT if we cover the parts of their skin that would show, with see throughish cheap, skin coloured cloth, thats okay!
NO. It's not fucking ok!
Yall are dumbasses. It still LOOKS like your 3 year old is running around half nekkid trying to get some fat pedo guy from Ohio to pick her up in the back of a van.
SERIOUSLY. MAKE YOUR DAUGHTER WEAR SOME DAMN CLOTHES.
"This year for Halloween, we're gonna dress up like old people!" Yeah! You don't see any Ohians picking up old migits, do you? No. A curly mop wig, some big ol glasses and a mumu and your 3 year old not only has the most creative costume out there, but dress up your son like mr. magoo and enter them in a contest. i bet youd win. infact, tie your cat to a string and have her cart around Garfield as well. Live props coupled with novelty costume ideas give you a huge leading edge.
I literally can't think of anything else. Goodday.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Pedo Bear is from Ohio
A touchy subject this time around, ladies and gents. Child Offenders. **DUN DUN DUNNNN**
These nasty slime of the earth like to touch your children. Ew. Ew indeed. However, I've begun to notice a pattern in these hundreds of child offender cases.
They are all men from Ohio. Wtf.
Now, not to totally "go there" with out a disclaimer. I'm about to rag on hardcore, the OH state. So if you like Ohio, for some stuuuuupid reason..... don't read this. Kthnx.
I've never been a big fan of Ohio to begain with. It's a drizzy state, with many white people. I don't like white people as a general rule. Which people think is silly, cuz I am white. You know who those people are? Other white people. --- Buuut anyway. Ohians, as I like to call them, annoy the crapola out of me. They are all yankees, and I hate yankees too. All of the people I have ever met from Ohio, which are a few, thank you, are rude. Depressing, lazy. LAAAZY. white. judgemental. psychos. They have problems coming out the ears.. and no matter what you say they brush you off.
Either they are over religious, or they are scary anarchists... OR they have like 4 wives and 35 children. Wtf.
Maybe it's the abundance of children that drive Ohians to wanna prey on them. I don't know... But in the past week I have read numerous (like over 10) headlines about child rapists or domestic violence cases all stemming from Ohio. Which means I will NEVER move there.
It kind of makes me question it. Like, okay, I knoooow that it's not JUST ohians, but seriously. Here are a few of my "favourite" stories so far. (that was typed with heavy sarcasm)
http://www.fox19.com/story/16010396/teen-arrested-in-rape-of-5-year-old-at-mcdonalds
A 13 year old? They start young.
Here's my favourite:
http://www.geaugamapleleaf.com/freestory/Newbury-father-charged-with-child-rape
That one is scary because he was about to progress from serial rapist into a serial killer ^ the note of excessive weapon owner ship and animal maiming and shooting shows evidence.
Here's actually a delightful conversation I had with one of my good friends on FB chat the other night about it while I was reading up on these horror stories. For protection of ID, we shall call her Jemma Goodlegs, and I shall be Beureguard Hemmingsway.
Please keep in mind that this was 4 am, we're both tired, in fact, I just had a kid and she's about to have one and we are HORMONAL. So if it's politically incorrect, just stop reading. (another disclaimer, I grew up with tons of middle eastern people of different religious variasions. I think you guys are the bees knees)
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/11/11/police-say-ohio-dad-beat-girl-over-alphabet-lesson/
oooh yeah. jail time for daddy
dude.. all the most fucked up child abuse stories ive read
ALWAYS come from Ohio state
Jemma Goodlegs:
yuck
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
they like BREED child offenders up there
New York has great Hot Dogs and Broadway.. New Jersey has bad air, Virginia has the biggest mall tourist attraction... Texas has the Cowboys cheerleading squade..OHIO HAS CHILD OFFENDERS
im 100 percent sure it's on their signs. "Welcome to Ohio. Hide yo' kids, Hide yo' wife!"
Jemma Goodlegs:
and hide yo husbands cuz they rapin everybody up in here
i thought they were all in kentucky and kansas
OH DUDE there's some stupid commercial thats been coming on the radio down here
its all like... THERE A NEW EPIDEMIC IN FLORIDA...
OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
uhhh
sicne when has that been NEW? XD
Jemma Goodlegs:
TUNE IN TO LEARN ALL ABOUT THIS DISTURBING NEW TREND!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
Florida, towards Miami, is HORRIBLE
:Jemma Goodlegs
i knoooow dude
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
a new trend!
Jemma Goodlegs:
im not kidding thats wut the commercial says
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
uh, how about the "rule of thumb"
Jemma Goodlegs:
its some news special thats coming on tv soon
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
people have been beating their spouses for centuries
its not new
just suddenly, it's less acceptable
Jemma Goodlegs:
and definitely not new for florida
well thank god for that
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
Florida is devived
you have.. the rich florida
Jemma Goodlegs:
mhm
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
then you have the party florida
and closely associated with teh party florida
is the white trash florida
and the white trash florida... make up more than half of the state
Jemma Goodlegs:
my first time in florida was miami itself for a missions trip and... its literally night and day separated by nothing but a CURB
one side... total party central, shopping, retraunts, hot kids everywhere
other side.... sidewalks lined with ppl sleeping on cardboard
gun shots
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
awesome
just awesome
America, for another win!
Jemma Goodlegs:
our little island has an interesting mix on its own
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
OH
OH OH
here's another breaking news report
a 13 year old has been apprehended after raping a 5 year old in a mcdonalds play ground
.....guess what state this happened in
.....OHIO.
Jemma Goodlegs:
we're on the beach side which has a lot of rich retired folk and a lot of touristy type shops and restaurants so its kinda nicer... but a few streets down from us its traaailer tooown and the majority of ppl u run into, unless they r doctors (fl got lots of drs for all the retired ppl lol) are very white trashy
Jemma Goodlegs:
WHOA
geez dude
what is with that state
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
i told you. ohio breeds them
didi posted a whole story that i bombarded with comments about a serial rapist that was in the making
and yeah.. florida is fucked up
where there is white trash.. there is UNDOUBTABLY domestic violence.
Jemma Goodlegs:
florida's where that huge story bout the mom who didnt report her daughter missing, pplk reported her car smelling like rotting flesh, and the kid turned up in the woods months later
Beareguard Hemmingsway:
its getting so much more bad rap though is because the past few years more women have come out and gone public.. like what's going on with Cain
Jemma Goodlegs:
dude dude dude when i was getting my sugar test there were these two other girls there i ended up talking to the whole time
they were both under 20, one pregnant for the second time the other one had two kids already and they both were telling me these INSANE stories of their horrible baby daddys and how they get beat up and screamed at all the time
who's cain?
Beareguard Hemmingsway:
and because with all th alternitive lifestyles and movements the woman liberation movement is liek WTF and now the government is being FORCED to deal with domestic violence like a real issue.. but they really dont care. because if d.v. is a real issue
that means they cant yell at their wives and grope their nannies
dude
srsly
fucked. up.
Jemma Goodlegs:
its good that its being looked at like a real issue!
IT IS!!!!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
and Cain is the republican presidential canidate!
Jemma Goodlegs:
ohhhh
see i dropped out of my political up-to-date-ness when i got pregnant lol
my focus went... elsewhere
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
it is a real issue. but for a country that claims equal rights for "EVERYONE" and always ragging on the middle east about how subjective they are to women
uhh. tell me why our country has THE highest rape and sexual harrassment rating of the world?
Jemma Goodlegs:
....yeeeeaaaaaah
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
africa is really bad too but its mostly killings not raping
Jemma Goodlegs:
no no no its got raping too dont worry
i dont know if america is actually the highest or if it just reported more here than in 3rd world countries
but we're certiainly worse off than like europe
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
im sorry. some middle eastern people are nasty to their wives. But I would rather see my husband be obligated and accept that he's got to take care of me. and be covered from eyes down because only my husband is aloud to look at me for the sake of being sacred.
instead of a world where it's almost unheard of to be a virgin at 15, to be judged by EVERYONE the LESS you wear the better and men can be pigs and it's just "boys being boys"
uh, id rather be covered up and protected and hindered than be strung out and guys talk to my clevage
Jemma Goodlegs:
thats the flip side of freedom is too many americans got totally spoiled on it... now TRUST ME i believe that welfare programs are extremely important especially when our own economy doesn't provide decent living wages for ppl who live and work in the city and such... but there are soooo many ppl who really do just... NOTHING. they do nothing. and live off of bogus unemployment and disability and drink and do drugs all day and are nasty, mean, terrible people in general
Jemma Goodlegs:
I KNOW
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
well you can only rate what you know.. if there are unreported cases we cant count those
Jemma Goodlegs:
we're both ranting at the same time lol ONLY ON CHAT is this possible
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahaha
ITS GREAT
uhg
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
America. Full of fat, perverted, spoiled, biggots with their idealistic back stabbing notions of freedom and equality
Jemma Goodlegs:
the only thing necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing
yeah...
we all know its true....
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
i want to make that into a bumper sticker
both of those
Jemma Goodlegs:
ur would be really small print to fit lol
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
if good men do nothing
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
they aren't really good
Jemma Goodlegs:
there u go
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
last time i checked, being nuetral didnt mean you were a good guy.. it meant you are neutral... **pokes at the dutch*
hahaha
Jemma Goodlegs:
apathetic
.... is pathetic
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
im going to put this whole convo in my blog
Jemma Goodlegs:
OHHh yEAAAAh ur blog is awesome btw
And thats enough now. I think I've sufficiantly offended enough people for the night. Please take note: Jemma Goodlegs thinks my blog is AWESOME.
These nasty slime of the earth like to touch your children. Ew. Ew indeed. However, I've begun to notice a pattern in these hundreds of child offender cases.
They are all men from Ohio. Wtf.
Now, not to totally "go there" with out a disclaimer. I'm about to rag on hardcore, the OH state. So if you like Ohio, for some stuuuuupid reason..... don't read this. Kthnx.
I've never been a big fan of Ohio to begain with. It's a drizzy state, with many white people. I don't like white people as a general rule. Which people think is silly, cuz I am white. You know who those people are? Other white people. --- Buuut anyway. Ohians, as I like to call them, annoy the crapola out of me. They are all yankees, and I hate yankees too. All of the people I have ever met from Ohio, which are a few, thank you, are rude. Depressing, lazy. LAAAZY. white. judgemental. psychos. They have problems coming out the ears.. and no matter what you say they brush you off.
Either they are over religious, or they are scary anarchists... OR they have like 4 wives and 35 children. Wtf.
Maybe it's the abundance of children that drive Ohians to wanna prey on them. I don't know... But in the past week I have read numerous (like over 10) headlines about child rapists or domestic violence cases all stemming from Ohio. Which means I will NEVER move there.
It kind of makes me question it. Like, okay, I knoooow that it's not JUST ohians, but seriously. Here are a few of my "favourite" stories so far. (that was typed with heavy sarcasm)
http://www.fox19.com/story/16010396/teen-arrested-in-rape-of-5-year-old-at-mcdonalds
A 13 year old? They start young.
Here's my favourite:
http://www.geaugamapleleaf.com/freestory/Newbury-father-charged-with-child-rape
That one is scary because he was about to progress from serial rapist into a serial killer ^ the note of excessive weapon owner ship and animal maiming and shooting shows evidence.
Here's actually a delightful conversation I had with one of my good friends on FB chat the other night about it while I was reading up on these horror stories. For protection of ID, we shall call her Jemma Goodlegs, and I shall be Beureguard Hemmingsway.
Please keep in mind that this was 4 am, we're both tired, in fact, I just had a kid and she's about to have one and we are HORMONAL. So if it's politically incorrect, just stop reading. (another disclaimer, I grew up with tons of middle eastern people of different religious variasions. I think you guys are the bees knees)
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2011/11/11/police-say-ohio-dad-beat-girl-over-alphabet-lesson/
oooh yeah. jail time for daddy
dude.. all the most fucked up child abuse stories ive read
ALWAYS come from Ohio state
Jemma Goodlegs:
yuck
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
they like BREED child offenders up there
New York has great Hot Dogs and Broadway.. New Jersey has bad air, Virginia has the biggest mall tourist attraction... Texas has the Cowboys cheerleading squade..OHIO HAS CHILD OFFENDERS
im 100 percent sure it's on their signs. "Welcome to Ohio. Hide yo' kids, Hide yo' wife!"
Jemma Goodlegs:
and hide yo husbands cuz they rapin everybody up in here
i thought they were all in kentucky and kansas
OH DUDE there's some stupid commercial thats been coming on the radio down here
its all like... THERE A NEW EPIDEMIC IN FLORIDA...
OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
uhhh
sicne when has that been NEW? XD
Jemma Goodlegs:
TUNE IN TO LEARN ALL ABOUT THIS DISTURBING NEW TREND!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
Florida, towards Miami, is HORRIBLE
:Jemma Goodlegs
i knoooow dude
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
a new trend!
Jemma Goodlegs:
im not kidding thats wut the commercial says
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
uh, how about the "rule of thumb"
Jemma Goodlegs:
its some news special thats coming on tv soon
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
people have been beating their spouses for centuries
its not new
just suddenly, it's less acceptable
Jemma Goodlegs:
and definitely not new for florida
well thank god for that
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
Florida is devived
you have.. the rich florida
Jemma Goodlegs:
mhm
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
then you have the party florida
and closely associated with teh party florida
is the white trash florida
and the white trash florida... make up more than half of the state
Jemma Goodlegs:
my first time in florida was miami itself for a missions trip and... its literally night and day separated by nothing but a CURB
one side... total party central, shopping, retraunts, hot kids everywhere
other side.... sidewalks lined with ppl sleeping on cardboard
gun shots
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
awesome
just awesome
America, for another win!
Jemma Goodlegs:
our little island has an interesting mix on its own
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
OH
OH OH
here's another breaking news report
a 13 year old has been apprehended after raping a 5 year old in a mcdonalds play ground
.....guess what state this happened in
.....OHIO.
Jemma Goodlegs:
we're on the beach side which has a lot of rich retired folk and a lot of touristy type shops and restaurants so its kinda nicer... but a few streets down from us its traaailer tooown and the majority of ppl u run into, unless they r doctors (fl got lots of drs for all the retired ppl lol) are very white trashy
Jemma Goodlegs:
WHOA
geez dude
what is with that state
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
i told you. ohio breeds them
didi posted a whole story that i bombarded with comments about a serial rapist that was in the making
and yeah.. florida is fucked up
where there is white trash.. there is UNDOUBTABLY domestic violence.
Jemma Goodlegs:
florida's where that huge story bout the mom who didnt report her daughter missing, pplk reported her car smelling like rotting flesh, and the kid turned up in the woods months later
Beareguard Hemmingsway:
its getting so much more bad rap though is because the past few years more women have come out and gone public.. like what's going on with Cain
Jemma Goodlegs:
dude dude dude when i was getting my sugar test there were these two other girls there i ended up talking to the whole time
they were both under 20, one pregnant for the second time the other one had two kids already and they both were telling me these INSANE stories of their horrible baby daddys and how they get beat up and screamed at all the time
who's cain?
Beareguard Hemmingsway:
and because with all th alternitive lifestyles and movements the woman liberation movement is liek WTF and now the government is being FORCED to deal with domestic violence like a real issue.. but they really dont care. because if d.v. is a real issue
that means they cant yell at their wives and grope their nannies
dude
srsly
fucked. up.
Jemma Goodlegs:
its good that its being looked at like a real issue!
IT IS!!!!
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
and Cain is the republican presidential canidate!
Jemma Goodlegs:
ohhhh
see i dropped out of my political up-to-date-ness when i got pregnant lol
my focus went... elsewhere
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
it is a real issue. but for a country that claims equal rights for "EVERYONE" and always ragging on the middle east about how subjective they are to women
uhh. tell me why our country has THE highest rape and sexual harrassment rating of the world?
Jemma Goodlegs:
....yeeeeaaaaaah
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
africa is really bad too but its mostly killings not raping
Jemma Goodlegs:
no no no its got raping too dont worry
i dont know if america is actually the highest or if it just reported more here than in 3rd world countries
but we're certiainly worse off than like europe
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
im sorry. some middle eastern people are nasty to their wives. But I would rather see my husband be obligated and accept that he's got to take care of me. and be covered from eyes down because only my husband is aloud to look at me for the sake of being sacred.
instead of a world where it's almost unheard of to be a virgin at 15, to be judged by EVERYONE the LESS you wear the better and men can be pigs and it's just "boys being boys"
uh, id rather be covered up and protected and hindered than be strung out and guys talk to my clevage
Jemma Goodlegs:
thats the flip side of freedom is too many americans got totally spoiled on it... now TRUST ME i believe that welfare programs are extremely important especially when our own economy doesn't provide decent living wages for ppl who live and work in the city and such... but there are soooo many ppl who really do just... NOTHING. they do nothing. and live off of bogus unemployment and disability and drink and do drugs all day and are nasty, mean, terrible people in general
Jemma Goodlegs:
I KNOW
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
well you can only rate what you know.. if there are unreported cases we cant count those
Jemma Goodlegs:
we're both ranting at the same time lol ONLY ON CHAT is this possible
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahaha
ITS GREAT
uhg
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
America. Full of fat, perverted, spoiled, biggots with their idealistic back stabbing notions of freedom and equality
Jemma Goodlegs:
the only thing necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing
yeah...
we all know its true....
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
i want to make that into a bumper sticker
both of those
Jemma Goodlegs:
ur would be really small print to fit lol
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
if good men do nothing
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
they aren't really good
Jemma Goodlegs:
there u go
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
last time i checked, being nuetral didnt mean you were a good guy.. it meant you are neutral... **pokes at the dutch*
hahaha
Jemma Goodlegs:
apathetic
.... is pathetic
Beaureguard Hemmingsway:
hahahaha
im going to put this whole convo in my blog
Jemma Goodlegs:
OHHh yEAAAAh ur blog is awesome btw
And thats enough now. I think I've sufficiantly offended enough people for the night. Please take note: Jemma Goodlegs thinks my blog is AWESOME.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Shove it in your Pooper!
Well, now. It's been yet again some time since I have blogged, but don't worry. This site is never going to die. Due to my creative juices fluxating at forever changing and random intervals, some days I have it, and other weeks I am a dead weight with many a lazy and one eyed brain cell. Please note I have no idea why they are one-eyed, but I always pictured the physical appearance of my brain cells to be sort of like jealatinous pink and purple and blue globs with 1 eye, and possibly some sharp teeth.
For this blog I would like to talk about child developement. Or rather, *my* children's developement.
I recieved an email in my inbox this afternoon (duh) from a relative of mine whom pretty much is the self appointed "guardian" of the family, at least on my father's side. With this being said, she is one of those in between elder people. Not old enough to the point where she can say whatever the hell she wants to and it's endearing of people just brush it off. But just old enough that she thinks that her opinion should be held in the upmost priority and that we can and should all adhear to her words and listen to her wisdom.
With all of that being said..... there is no wisdom. She comes from a rich, broken family. Upper class white lawyer wife who's life is seemingly fantastic to anyone with less than a good amount of money in this economy, but to anyone who knows the family thoroughly and listens to her hardened hearted and bitter critisims they know better. Damn, dude. Didn't Grandma love on you as a kid?
The answer is no.
But anyway, we only speak or see each other on the big holidays, like thanksgiving and christmas. Yeah, that's right. CHRISTmas. So sue me. She's an ok relative, I love all her kids and have always looked up to them greatly. But as I have gotten older and maade my own, very out of the box, life choices, I seem to have dwindled her support into mere broken dreams of what SHE expected me to be. No. I'm not talking about my Mom. Who, btw, is fucking amazing.
Again, I digress. She sent me an email today that started out as what I thought a pleasant older person's advice on a subject. Children watch too much TV. I agree completely. Growing up I watched maybe an hour and a half of TV at the very most. I woke up, had breakfast, did school work, played out side, came in, ate lunch (some times i watched tv while i did this) most of the time we ate at the table and talked as a family (gasp) had a nap, woke up, played out side, ate a snack outside, came in for dinner, as always at the table, had a bath, book, songs sung, bed time.
My children right now are leading a different childhood. We live in a 1 bedroom apartment. The den is taken by my brother, and our dining room is taken by a family of 3. We have no table. No chairs. We have 1 sofa, a table top stand with a TV on it, and 1 bookshelf. That is our living room. We eat, nap, play, read, watch TV, talk, fight, do laundry, clean and entertain company in our living room. I am a stay at home mom and I have a 3 month old and a 19 month old. Their routein looks like this. Wake up, have breakfast while Uncle watches them and takes Daddy to work. Mommy comes home an hour later and the 19 month old plays, mommy nurses the baby then plays too. Some times Mommy doses while nursing baby, but the room is completely child proof and if I need mommy I am not shy to scream her name. Have lunch, get dressed, take Uncle to work. Come home, have a nap. Wake up, have snack. After snack play the rest of the evening until we have to pick Daddy up. Then we pick up Uncle while we're out. Then at 9 30 pm we come home. Have dinner, get in pjs, and go to sleep.
Most days I choose to take my children out of our one room wonderland. We go to the mall and we run and play and some times I spoil us by getting Auntie Anne's prestzles and a juice. We go to my friends house all the way out in Lovettes ville. We visit people at work, we run and do errands, some times we just play out side on the play ground. But truthfully, unless we're out of hte house, the TV in our house is playing ALL. THE. TIME.
You know what I've learned? That a substance, anything at all, that is controled and told how to be used, becomes more desired. My brother and I were pretty obsessed with TV. I love TV. Granted we didn't fuss or fight over it, we loved playing outside... but when it got turned on we were glued and always wanted to watch more. In my teen years my mom didnt really give a crap. We were older and made most of our own decisions. I never watched TV. Ever. Because I knew it was there when ever I needed or wanted it. I could play outside, talk online, paint my nails, take 5 hours in the shower, and then I was done....the TV would still be available. I didnt miss my small window of oprotunity. And because I knew it wasn't "now or never"... I never needed it.
Same with my kids. My daughter will all together watch maybe 2 hours of TV a day. ThatsGabba Gabba" and she'll shut up and be quiet for the whole 30 minutes but you know what she's doing?........she's making the crayons talk to each other. She's singing along with the songs on the TV. shes colouring, drawing, tearing up the paper and making the paper bits talk to each other. She knows TV isn't a controled substance in our house hold, and as such, she feels no desire to constantly have it.
My relative then goes on to say how too much TV, if I let my kids watch it, will kill their aspirations and discourage them from chasing down goals. That they will grow listless, restless, and stupid. Funny. Out of the TV that my child does watch, she has learned to dance, "shake", play simon says, she's learned hundreds of words, she's learned how to count along, and she's learned her vowels..........she is a year and a half old. Daddy and I are constantly counting, singing, clapping, encouraging her dancing, her drawing and so on and so forth, but she also does it along with the TV. She doesn't seem to be rude, fat, lazy, or unimaginative at all. If anything, she's perky and energetic on her most off days. And we have TV on all the time. I let her choose what she wants to do, but I encourage healthy behavior, and she follows Mommy's example, not TVs.
My relative then starts talking about how the true successfullness of a child cannot be determined until they are at least 30, and have chosen a career to master. That unless they go to college and train for this career, they are less of a person, less of a member of society, and less of a success.
I'm sorry, Excuse me? Did you just dis me? My family? My kids? My choices? Oh, yes. yes you did.
I never went to college. I received an invitation from the Coquran of Fine Arts in D.C. when I was 16, telling me that when I was of age they would love it if I atteneded. It wasn't a scholarship.. it was them saying "we want you". It might have turned into a scholarship, but I was much too young to live on my own in D.C..
Instead of college, although I still plan on going,I decided to work, save money, get a place to live, a car, a boyfriend, and unexpectedly ended up with 2 kids. Chances at school? Still just as good as ever. Even though this relative holds the entire family's pocket book, she has never offered to help me in any way. She has bconstantly looked down her nose towards my efforts to make my own life the way I want it and I resent her for it. Not going to sugar coat it. I hate her for it. She is insinuating that I am A - still not old or mature enough to know that my choices effect "the familys reputation" and that I have fucked up big time and B - I didn't go to college, so I am never going to be able to go anywhere with my life. Nor will my brother, nor my fiance.
My children are not successful to the family unless they correct my mistakes and go to college themselves and turn into clones of the corporate America. Screw that. Here is what I posted on my FB status earlier in a blind fit of rage:
Got an email from my **** about how letting children watch tv will instill in them rebellion and lenient ways. They will not or want to reach aspirations or goals. She also says that the success of a child that you raise won't be determined until their at least 30 with their chosen career path sets in. Oh I'm sorry, my kids have to be corporately careered to be successful?! Its also a slap in my face because she is insinuating that since I am A-not older and B - didn't train for a career at college that I am less successful. This is the biggest crock of bullshit anyone has ever said to me. There is no age appropriate to determine "successfulness". It is entirely how you live your life, from start to finish, and for me and my family, it is about how we direct ourselves spiritually and morally. If my daughter wants to grow up to be a stripper, she better be the best damned stripper there is. If my son wants to become a nomad and commune with nature at its purest, I will tell him to visit me every year to teach me what he's learned! My children are a success to me every single day every time they learn, or rather teach me how smart they are. Screw you*****.
It's true. in my family and the way we are raising our children, ANYTHING, /ANYTHING/, they want to do or be as long as they put all their effort into it, is successful to me. My 1 1/2 year old is successful to me now, every time she learns a new word, shows me how high she has taught herself to jump, done a puzzle, kissed her brother, or ate all her veggies with out fighting me. My son is successful to me every time I see that he's learned a new sound, he now knows who we are by sight and sound instead of smell and instinct, he can sit up anstands with help and he can turn his head and follow you with his eyes. He laughs and smiles and is learning how to hold things by himself. I learn more from my children than they learn from me. That's the way it should be.
So forgive me for saying, relative of mine, but take all your rich, trash talk of corporate
America and shove it in your pooper!
For this blog I would like to talk about child developement. Or rather, *my* children's developement.
I recieved an email in my inbox this afternoon (duh) from a relative of mine whom pretty much is the self appointed "guardian" of the family, at least on my father's side. With this being said, she is one of those in between elder people. Not old enough to the point where she can say whatever the hell she wants to and it's endearing of people just brush it off. But just old enough that she thinks that her opinion should be held in the upmost priority and that we can and should all adhear to her words and listen to her wisdom.
With all of that being said..... there is no wisdom. She comes from a rich, broken family. Upper class white lawyer wife who's life is seemingly fantastic to anyone with less than a good amount of money in this economy, but to anyone who knows the family thoroughly and listens to her hardened hearted and bitter critisims they know better. Damn, dude. Didn't Grandma love on you as a kid?
The answer is no.
But anyway, we only speak or see each other on the big holidays, like thanksgiving and christmas. Yeah, that's right. CHRISTmas. So sue me. She's an ok relative, I love all her kids and have always looked up to them greatly. But as I have gotten older and maade my own, very out of the box, life choices, I seem to have dwindled her support into mere broken dreams of what SHE expected me to be. No. I'm not talking about my Mom. Who, btw, is fucking amazing.
Again, I digress. She sent me an email today that started out as what I thought a pleasant older person's advice on a subject. Children watch too much TV. I agree completely. Growing up I watched maybe an hour and a half of TV at the very most. I woke up, had breakfast, did school work, played out side, came in, ate lunch (some times i watched tv while i did this) most of the time we ate at the table and talked as a family (gasp) had a nap, woke up, played out side, ate a snack outside, came in for dinner, as always at the table, had a bath, book, songs sung, bed time.
My children right now are leading a different childhood. We live in a 1 bedroom apartment. The den is taken by my brother, and our dining room is taken by a family of 3. We have no table. No chairs. We have 1 sofa, a table top stand with a TV on it, and 1 bookshelf. That is our living room. We eat, nap, play, read, watch TV, talk, fight, do laundry, clean and entertain company in our living room. I am a stay at home mom and I have a 3 month old and a 19 month old. Their routein looks like this. Wake up, have breakfast while Uncle watches them and takes Daddy to work. Mommy comes home an hour later and the 19 month old plays, mommy nurses the baby then plays too. Some times Mommy doses while nursing baby, but the room is completely child proof and if I need mommy I am not shy to scream her name. Have lunch, get dressed, take Uncle to work. Come home, have a nap. Wake up, have snack. After snack play the rest of the evening until we have to pick Daddy up. Then we pick up Uncle while we're out. Then at 9 30 pm we come home. Have dinner, get in pjs, and go to sleep.
Most days I choose to take my children out of our one room wonderland. We go to the mall and we run and play and some times I spoil us by getting Auntie Anne's prestzles and a juice. We go to my friends house all the way out in Lovettes ville. We visit people at work, we run and do errands, some times we just play out side on the play ground. But truthfully, unless we're out of hte house, the TV in our house is playing ALL. THE. TIME.
You know what I've learned? That a substance, anything at all, that is controled and told how to be used, becomes more desired. My brother and I were pretty obsessed with TV. I love TV. Granted we didn't fuss or fight over it, we loved playing outside... but when it got turned on we were glued and always wanted to watch more. In my teen years my mom didnt really give a crap. We were older and made most of our own decisions. I never watched TV. Ever. Because I knew it was there when ever I needed or wanted it. I could play outside, talk online, paint my nails, take 5 hours in the shower, and then I was done....the TV would still be available. I didnt miss my small window of oprotunity. And because I knew it wasn't "now or never"... I never needed it.
Same with my kids. My daughter will all together watch maybe 2 hours of TV a day. ThatsGabba Gabba" and she'll shut up and be quiet for the whole 30 minutes but you know what she's doing?........she's making the crayons talk to each other. She's singing along with the songs on the TV. shes colouring, drawing, tearing up the paper and making the paper bits talk to each other. She knows TV isn't a controled substance in our house hold, and as such, she feels no desire to constantly have it.
My relative then goes on to say how too much TV, if I let my kids watch it, will kill their aspirations and discourage them from chasing down goals. That they will grow listless, restless, and stupid. Funny. Out of the TV that my child does watch, she has learned to dance, "shake", play simon says, she's learned hundreds of words, she's learned how to count along, and she's learned her vowels..........she is a year and a half old. Daddy and I are constantly counting, singing, clapping, encouraging her dancing, her drawing and so on and so forth, but she also does it along with the TV. She doesn't seem to be rude, fat, lazy, or unimaginative at all. If anything, she's perky and energetic on her most off days. And we have TV on all the time. I let her choose what she wants to do, but I encourage healthy behavior, and she follows Mommy's example, not TVs.
My relative then starts talking about how the true successfullness of a child cannot be determined until they are at least 30, and have chosen a career to master. That unless they go to college and train for this career, they are less of a person, less of a member of society, and less of a success.
I'm sorry, Excuse me? Did you just dis me? My family? My kids? My choices? Oh, yes. yes you did.
I never went to college. I received an invitation from the Coquran of Fine Arts in D.C. when I was 16, telling me that when I was of age they would love it if I atteneded. It wasn't a scholarship.. it was them saying "we want you". It might have turned into a scholarship, but I was much too young to live on my own in D.C..
Instead of college, although I still plan on going,I decided to work, save money, get a place to live, a car, a boyfriend, and unexpectedly ended up with 2 kids. Chances at school? Still just as good as ever. Even though this relative holds the entire family's pocket book, she has never offered to help me in any way. She has bconstantly looked down her nose towards my efforts to make my own life the way I want it and I resent her for it. Not going to sugar coat it. I hate her for it. She is insinuating that I am A - still not old or mature enough to know that my choices effect "the familys reputation" and that I have fucked up big time and B - I didn't go to college, so I am never going to be able to go anywhere with my life. Nor will my brother, nor my fiance.
My children are not successful to the family unless they correct my mistakes and go to college themselves and turn into clones of the corporate America. Screw that. Here is what I posted on my FB status earlier in a blind fit of rage:
Got an email from my **** about how letting children watch tv will instill in them rebellion and lenient ways. They will not or want to reach aspirations or goals. She also says that the success of a child that you raise won't be determined until their at least 30 with their chosen career path sets in. Oh I'm sorry, my kids have to be corporately careered to be successful?! Its also a slap in my face because she is insinuating that since I am A-not older and B - didn't train for a career at college that I am less successful. This is the biggest crock of bullshit anyone has ever said to me. There is no age appropriate to determine "successfulness". It is entirely how you live your life, from start to finish, and for me and my family, it is about how we direct ourselves spiritually and morally. If my daughter wants to grow up to be a stripper, she better be the best damned stripper there is. If my son wants to become a nomad and commune with nature at its purest, I will tell him to visit me every year to teach me what he's learned! My children are a success to me every single day every time they learn, or rather teach me how smart they are. Screw you*****.
It's true. in my family and the way we are raising our children, ANYTHING, /ANYTHING/, they want to do or be as long as they put all their effort into it, is successful to me. My 1 1/2 year old is successful to me now, every time she learns a new word, shows me how high she has taught herself to jump, done a puzzle, kissed her brother, or ate all her veggies with out fighting me. My son is successful to me every time I see that he's learned a new sound, he now knows who we are by sight and sound instead of smell and instinct, he can sit up anstands with help and he can turn his head and follow you with his eyes. He laughs and smiles and is learning how to hold things by himself. I learn more from my children than they learn from me. That's the way it should be.
So forgive me for saying, relative of mine, but take all your rich, trash talk of corporate
America and shove it in your pooper!
Monday, October 3, 2011
Herp Derp, Derp de Derp
I totally just dropped my mouse off the side of the bed. But I didn't just "drop it", I totally (and accidentally) flung it off the side where it noisily reverberated off the side of the dining room chair where my keyboard and monitor are resting on, then rammed itself into the box spring of my bed, then fell short and hit the metal bed frame that sticks out from under my bed and then onto the floor where it hit the carpet upside down and made my very, very retardedly slow derpy computer make very loud thinking noises as it tried to figure out exactly what the hell I had just done to it.
And now after explaining all of that in such detail, I realize just how extreamly ghetto my little set up is. But it's comfortable. Lol, and practicality/functionality > feung swei or however you spell that crap.
I also realize I have not posted in weeks. Well, you know WHAT?! Sorry. Lol. It really has just been writer's block and a bad case of being way to tired and busy and lazy. If all those things together make sense... <_<;
In my last entry, I talked about my car. I ended up getting a different, but much loved van. It's a 2004 Kia Sedona. I love it. To death. I've had to get it fixed twice now because of the check engine light coming on all the time, but for some reason, it doesn't bother me like it would've in my shitty Saturn. Or my..."Shiturn" if you will. Haha...ahem. "Shaturn"? Whatever.
It's big, but not by minivan standards. Good Lord, I looked at a 2010 Odyssey, who on EARTH would need a car like that? it's not a Van, it's a friggin' bus. A BUS, PEOPLE. I could charge all the bikers in my neighbore hood a buck seventy five each way and make some money with a car that big.
I'm a small person, it was daunting.
I have graced my new possession with an awesome name "The Stallion", and have also decorated The Stallion's backside with many a precious sticker. Well, okay. 3 so far. But 3 and COUNTING!
There are a few random topics I'd like to get to in this entry. I was just thinking and musing (which apparently are the same thing) the other day while I drove The Stallion.
I had been told by a stranger at the store I was just at that my 2 2/3 month old son looks exactly like me. Exactly like me? I pondered. Weird. Because everyone up until that point had said he either A: Looks like his Uncle (my little brother) or B: Looks like Dave (my oriental boyfriend and baby daddy). and in my own opinion, my child looks NOTHING like me. He has my facial xpressions, with all the stupid ways he contorts his eyebrows and lips, but his actual features are nothing like mine. My daughter looks like me, in fact, she looks EXACTLY like me when I was her age. But she has most definently Dave's facial expressions and spazzy attitude. And she does look very mixed, (white and viet) where as Vinh (my son) looks more on the white side, but then his eyes are very almond shaped. Chinky.Yeah, that's right, I used the word chinky. I'm practically married to an asian, so sue me.
(no seriously, don't sue me. I'm poor as heeeeeeyll)
But anyway. You know how we comppliment anyone on anything we can think of at the time, just to try to be nice? You dont want to say nothing, because thats just awkward, but you don't want to make an actual opinion about something to someone you're just talking lightly too and hardly know, because what if that opinion is offensive?
Like asking a woman when her baby is due and then finding out that she's just horribly and oddly shaped.
I think, automatically, people tell me my children look like me because A: I am the mom. And B: I usually am the one with them in public, not their father. No one, hardly ever tells the Dad that the baby looks like him. You know why? Because Mom sat there for 10 freaking months, bloated to the size of a hot air balloon, and then squeezed something the equivalent to a watermellon out of her doughnut hole. To say that all that hard work and effort and motherly tenderness they have to display to this spawn, didn't pay off and they look like their dad, whether or not he's a handsome son of a bitch, seems unfair and just not doable. Maybe she finds it offensive. "How dare you say my daughter looks like a MAN." You have to take into consideration whether or not the parent at hand is ugly. If the mom is a fugly troll, then it's safe to say feelings will be hurt because of low self esteem, not just gratification for going through such drastic bodily changes.
But at the same time, you will say it. "Wow, you're baby looks just like you!" Why? Because you don't have the other parent to compare, and it's fair to say that if Mom is a sensetive type, you will get spat on. or cursed out. You will lie. Simply to please a total stranger and to keep your awkward conmversation from getting more awkward. Kind of like complimenting your grandmother on her Bill Cosby sweater. Normally this false praise is a reaction towards someone else's compliment. "I love your haircut. I had mine like that once." You don't want to be a cocky son of a bitch and just say "Really? Thanks." you want to say somethign nice back, naturally. You look for an opening... "Your baby looks just like you."
Here's the bad part. I find this false praise offensive more than someone telling me that my kids don't look like me. Don't tell me my kids look like me. What if I personally think my kid looks kinda derpy? I know it's BS. Know why? They're half Vietnamese. I would never say anything against them though, after all, it's better than someone saying "Wow, you're baby is uuuugly! He looks just like you!" They are just trying to make light conversation by stating poorly assessed observations.
At times like that, I always think to myself about how hilarious it would be to give this person such a hard time.
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's a boy."
"What do you mean he looks like me? This kid is ugly as hell!"
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's half asian. Are you saying I look ASIAN!?"
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's adopted, dumbass."
haha. Insanity would follow! All hell would break loose! That pimply faced, crackling voiced teenager who was just trying to be lazy in conversation only trying to make my day more bright wouldn't know what to do with himself! I would give him crazy, angry acusing looks as he stumbled over his words to come up with an excuse or an indirect form of apology for his misjudgement.
That whole story and thought process I just finished typing out seems WAY longer put on "paper", so to speak, as it did in my head. And it's already 4 am!!
Time for bed. Seeing on how I'm a stay at home mom now (which does anything except allows me to stay at home) I have responsibilties to attend to tomorrow. Er.. later today. Later this morning, to be precise.
I'll start posting more often again, don't worry. And remember, think very carefully before you comment on someone's derpy baby looking like them.
And now after explaining all of that in such detail, I realize just how extreamly ghetto my little set up is. But it's comfortable. Lol, and practicality/functionality > feung swei or however you spell that crap.
I also realize I have not posted in weeks. Well, you know WHAT?! Sorry. Lol. It really has just been writer's block and a bad case of being way to tired and busy and lazy. If all those things together make sense... <_<;
In my last entry, I talked about my car. I ended up getting a different, but much loved van. It's a 2004 Kia Sedona. I love it. To death. I've had to get it fixed twice now because of the check engine light coming on all the time, but for some reason, it doesn't bother me like it would've in my shitty Saturn. Or my..."Shiturn" if you will. Haha...ahem. "Shaturn"? Whatever.
It's big, but not by minivan standards. Good Lord, I looked at a 2010 Odyssey, who on EARTH would need a car like that? it's not a Van, it's a friggin' bus. A BUS, PEOPLE. I could charge all the bikers in my neighbore hood a buck seventy five each way and make some money with a car that big.
I'm a small person, it was daunting.
I have graced my new possession with an awesome name "The Stallion", and have also decorated The Stallion's backside with many a precious sticker. Well, okay. 3 so far. But 3 and COUNTING!
There are a few random topics I'd like to get to in this entry. I was just thinking and musing (which apparently are the same thing) the other day while I drove The Stallion.
I had been told by a stranger at the store I was just at that my 2 2/3 month old son looks exactly like me. Exactly like me? I pondered. Weird. Because everyone up until that point had said he either A: Looks like his Uncle (my little brother) or B: Looks like Dave (my oriental boyfriend and baby daddy). and in my own opinion, my child looks NOTHING like me. He has my facial xpressions, with all the stupid ways he contorts his eyebrows and lips, but his actual features are nothing like mine. My daughter looks like me, in fact, she looks EXACTLY like me when I was her age. But she has most definently Dave's facial expressions and spazzy attitude. And she does look very mixed, (white and viet) where as Vinh (my son) looks more on the white side, but then his eyes are very almond shaped. Chinky.Yeah, that's right, I used the word chinky. I'm practically married to an asian, so sue me.
(no seriously, don't sue me. I'm poor as heeeeeeyll)
But anyway. You know how we comppliment anyone on anything we can think of at the time, just to try to be nice? You dont want to say nothing, because thats just awkward, but you don't want to make an actual opinion about something to someone you're just talking lightly too and hardly know, because what if that opinion is offensive?
Like asking a woman when her baby is due and then finding out that she's just horribly and oddly shaped.
I think, automatically, people tell me my children look like me because A: I am the mom. And B: I usually am the one with them in public, not their father. No one, hardly ever tells the Dad that the baby looks like him. You know why? Because Mom sat there for 10 freaking months, bloated to the size of a hot air balloon, and then squeezed something the equivalent to a watermellon out of her doughnut hole. To say that all that hard work and effort and motherly tenderness they have to display to this spawn, didn't pay off and they look like their dad, whether or not he's a handsome son of a bitch, seems unfair and just not doable. Maybe she finds it offensive. "How dare you say my daughter looks like a MAN." You have to take into consideration whether or not the parent at hand is ugly. If the mom is a fugly troll, then it's safe to say feelings will be hurt because of low self esteem, not just gratification for going through such drastic bodily changes.
But at the same time, you will say it. "Wow, you're baby looks just like you!" Why? Because you don't have the other parent to compare, and it's fair to say that if Mom is a sensetive type, you will get spat on. or cursed out. You will lie. Simply to please a total stranger and to keep your awkward conmversation from getting more awkward. Kind of like complimenting your grandmother on her Bill Cosby sweater. Normally this false praise is a reaction towards someone else's compliment. "I love your haircut. I had mine like that once." You don't want to be a cocky son of a bitch and just say "Really? Thanks." you want to say somethign nice back, naturally. You look for an opening... "Your baby looks just like you."
Here's the bad part. I find this false praise offensive more than someone telling me that my kids don't look like me. Don't tell me my kids look like me. What if I personally think my kid looks kinda derpy? I know it's BS. Know why? They're half Vietnamese. I would never say anything against them though, after all, it's better than someone saying "Wow, you're baby is uuuugly! He looks just like you!" They are just trying to make light conversation by stating poorly assessed observations.
At times like that, I always think to myself about how hilarious it would be to give this person such a hard time.
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's a boy."
"What do you mean he looks like me? This kid is ugly as hell!"
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's half asian. Are you saying I look ASIAN!?"
"What do you mean he looks like me? He's adopted, dumbass."
haha. Insanity would follow! All hell would break loose! That pimply faced, crackling voiced teenager who was just trying to be lazy in conversation only trying to make my day more bright wouldn't know what to do with himself! I would give him crazy, angry acusing looks as he stumbled over his words to come up with an excuse or an indirect form of apology for his misjudgement.
That whole story and thought process I just finished typing out seems WAY longer put on "paper", so to speak, as it did in my head. And it's already 4 am!!
Time for bed. Seeing on how I'm a stay at home mom now (which does anything except allows me to stay at home) I have responsibilties to attend to tomorrow. Er.. later today. Later this morning, to be precise.
I'll start posting more often again, don't worry. And remember, think very carefully before you comment on someone's derpy baby looking like them.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Is That Raccoon Dead? Naw, He's Just Playing Possum.
im not exactly sure why my punctuation and my words wil not be capitalized in this entry. but perhaps it is because im typing on my phone, and it reaaaaallllyyyy doesnt likw my blogger for some reason.
i actually havent posted in a few days, but its because ive been sooooooo freaking tierd. going to bed by nine fourty five, waking up at ten am. damn.
i also have yet to decide whether its my extream fatigue getting in the way of my creative writing and my unstoppable commitment to not let this blog die, or whthether its just my being equally as lazy...which.. may very well be the case. as proven above when i am now going to fail to correct my spelling errors.
well in brand new news... haha... new news...im getting a new car tomorrow. that statement would have an exclaimation mark at the end of it instead of a period but again...im apparently not allowed to use propper punctuation. damn android is going to get me in trouble with all those grammar nazis out there...x.x
but back to business. yes. a new car. not a cool car... not a new new car. not a sparkling sporty or dastardly dashing speedy speeding car. no. i love the car. its red... very faded. its clean, but very used. scratched and buffed on the outside. it looks like something my children have already gotten a hold of. maybe thats why i like it so much.
but im worried. its a minivan. yes. a minivan. i have hit the ultimate low in every very young parents life. shall i be known from now on to my equal in age single childless friends as soccor mom? the dreaded of all the spots fans.. big, white heavily sweaty women. with their visors or baseball caps. their lack of makeup or their over use of it. some times smelling like arm pit.. some times smelling like they took a bath in every single free sample at the perfume counters at JC Penny. usually blonde, almost always white.. bleach blonde hair cut short or pulled back into a sloppy ponytail that will jsut shake loose anyway as they move themselves up and down the side lines of that blistering hot soccor field like giant, aggressive whale sharks, screaming at the refferee like hes the new fat, deaf and mentally handicapt kid on the playground. forever their lives shall be carting everyones children like they are their own around in their gold, blue, white or black minivans or SUVs. yeah, thats right. they roll in SUVs now. im not even an updated version of the soccor mom. is this what ive really become.
no.
i vouch that my minivan is old, worn, looks like it may have lost a fight or two or been run through a field full of angry hornets, but it shall be the coolest van ever....and with it... i, the coolest van mom.
minivans not only are fantastic for carting the entire soccor teams smelly cleats and shin guards around while your children feast at cicis pizza with their best friends way more cooler mom after the game. but they are now the official party bus.... only a van.
think about it...tinted windows, awesome gas milage, great stereo system.. leg room to boot. im starting to think this minivan thing wont be so bad after all.. oh yes. i shall rock this new found minvan world.
i actually havent posted in a few days, but its because ive been sooooooo freaking tierd. going to bed by nine fourty five, waking up at ten am. damn.
i also have yet to decide whether its my extream fatigue getting in the way of my creative writing and my unstoppable commitment to not let this blog die, or whthether its just my being equally as lazy...which.. may very well be the case. as proven above when i am now going to fail to correct my spelling errors.
well in brand new news... haha... new news...im getting a new car tomorrow. that statement would have an exclaimation mark at the end of it instead of a period but again...im apparently not allowed to use propper punctuation. damn android is going to get me in trouble with all those grammar nazis out there...x.x
but back to business. yes. a new car. not a cool car... not a new new car. not a sparkling sporty or dastardly dashing speedy speeding car. no. i love the car. its red... very faded. its clean, but very used. scratched and buffed on the outside. it looks like something my children have already gotten a hold of. maybe thats why i like it so much.
but im worried. its a minivan. yes. a minivan. i have hit the ultimate low in every very young parents life. shall i be known from now on to my equal in age single childless friends as soccor mom? the dreaded of all the spots fans.. big, white heavily sweaty women. with their visors or baseball caps. their lack of makeup or their over use of it. some times smelling like arm pit.. some times smelling like they took a bath in every single free sample at the perfume counters at JC Penny. usually blonde, almost always white.. bleach blonde hair cut short or pulled back into a sloppy ponytail that will jsut shake loose anyway as they move themselves up and down the side lines of that blistering hot soccor field like giant, aggressive whale sharks, screaming at the refferee like hes the new fat, deaf and mentally handicapt kid on the playground. forever their lives shall be carting everyones children like they are their own around in their gold, blue, white or black minivans or SUVs. yeah, thats right. they roll in SUVs now. im not even an updated version of the soccor mom. is this what ive really become.
no.
i vouch that my minivan is old, worn, looks like it may have lost a fight or two or been run through a field full of angry hornets, but it shall be the coolest van ever....and with it... i, the coolest van mom.
minivans not only are fantastic for carting the entire soccor teams smelly cleats and shin guards around while your children feast at cicis pizza with their best friends way more cooler mom after the game. but they are now the official party bus.... only a van.
think about it...tinted windows, awesome gas milage, great stereo system.. leg room to boot. im starting to think this minivan thing wont be so bad after all.. oh yes. i shall rock this new found minvan world.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Bodily Injuries, Car Explosions and Nicotene
Hello, what's this? Anger! Yeah, tha'ts right. A bitch be ragin'! Maybe it's because I haven't had anything to eat today.
Maybe it's because I just had a 20 minute tempertantrum battle with my 18 month old about going to bed.
Maybe it's because I feel like a shit parent 'cuz I had to smack her a few times (through the diaper mind you) before she would stfu enough to let me tuck her into bed.
Maybe it's because I'm out of cigarettes.
Maybe it's because even if I had cigarettes, I couldn't smoke them because I'm breastfeeding my 2nd monster.
Maybe it's because I have to wake up at 9 am and deal with the government workers.
Maybe it's because after that I have to drive people around for work and spend gas that I don't have.
Maybe it's because AFTER I drive everyone around, my kid has a Drs appt. during traffic hours and is gonna have to get shots and that's no fun for anyone.
Maybe it's because I had a kid 2 months ago and I'm a saggy bag of cross haired hormones.
Maybe it's because when I try to have a adult conversation with someone, they give me attitude.
**bitch bitch bitch**
Ahem. Have you ever been so Angry you:
1-Wanted to pour scalding soup over someone's face. Or even in their lap.
2- Wanted to blast sing "Friday" by Rebecca Black until someone's ears bled.
3- Wanted to duct tape them to a rocket like Sid did to Buzz Lightear in the 1st Toy Story movie.
4- Set that rocket off.
5- Wanted to puke into someone's shoes.
6- Wanted to pretend you were a ninja and scare the crap out of people by jumping into their windows.
7- Commit reverse Hari Kari.
8- Wanted to dress up like a cowboy and tell someone "This Town Ain't Big Enough Fer The 2'O'Us."
9- Wanted to drive by the Harry Potter fan line that started 3 weeks before the release of the book only to shout that Snape kills Dumbledoor.
10- Wanted to dance like Kevin Bacon from Footloose.
11- Wanted to smoke a whole pack of cigarettes just because someone told you you can't.
12- Wanted to create the last scene from Felma and Louise and drive your car off a cliff. While on fire. (that part wasn't in the movie. holla @ improv)
13- Wanted to go to a petstore and tell children that you eat puppies.
Rage face.
Maybe it's because I just had a 20 minute tempertantrum battle with my 18 month old about going to bed.
Maybe it's because I feel like a shit parent 'cuz I had to smack her a few times (through the diaper mind you) before she would stfu enough to let me tuck her into bed.
Maybe it's because I'm out of cigarettes.
Maybe it's because even if I had cigarettes, I couldn't smoke them because I'm breastfeeding my 2nd monster.
Maybe it's because I have to wake up at 9 am and deal with the government workers.
Maybe it's because after that I have to drive people around for work and spend gas that I don't have.
Maybe it's because AFTER I drive everyone around, my kid has a Drs appt. during traffic hours and is gonna have to get shots and that's no fun for anyone.
Maybe it's because I had a kid 2 months ago and I'm a saggy bag of cross haired hormones.
Maybe it's because when I try to have a adult conversation with someone, they give me attitude.
**bitch bitch bitch**
Ahem. Have you ever been so Angry you:
1-Wanted to pour scalding soup over someone's face. Or even in their lap.
2- Wanted to blast sing "Friday" by Rebecca Black until someone's ears bled.
3- Wanted to duct tape them to a rocket like Sid did to Buzz Lightear in the 1st Toy Story movie.
4- Set that rocket off.
5- Wanted to puke into someone's shoes.
6- Wanted to pretend you were a ninja and scare the crap out of people by jumping into their windows.
7- Commit reverse Hari Kari.
8- Wanted to dress up like a cowboy and tell someone "This Town Ain't Big Enough Fer The 2'O'Us."
9- Wanted to drive by the Harry Potter fan line that started 3 weeks before the release of the book only to shout that Snape kills Dumbledoor.
10- Wanted to dance like Kevin Bacon from Footloose.
11- Wanted to smoke a whole pack of cigarettes just because someone told you you can't.
12- Wanted to create the last scene from Felma and Louise and drive your car off a cliff. While on fire. (that part wasn't in the movie. holla @ improv)
13- Wanted to go to a petstore and tell children that you eat puppies.
Rage face.
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